TO THE PEOPLE WHO SAY I’VE CHANGED…

I realize I don’t owe anyone an explanation, so I’d like to get that out of the way first. I am completely aware that I am not responsible for how people perceive me — especially when their perceptions are askew.

Full disclosure, this isn’t for them—it’s for me.  Why is it important that I defend myself? In the grand scheme of things, it probably isn’t at all. However to me, in my life right now, it’s huge.  It’s so huge in fact, that it’s keeping me up at night and overpowering my thoughts.

So I am putting this out there, and I’m doing it for me.  In publishing this, I am giving myself permission to release the unbearable heavy weight of trying to please everyone. I can’t and I never will. So I will type this, and bid these feelings—and those who have fallen out of love with me, adieu.

To The People Who Say I’ve Changed:

You are damn right I’ve changed. 

In May of last year, One year and four months ago, I was a mother of three working at a carpentry company.  I made a silly video for no reason other than I felt like it—and it went viral. 

That was never my plan…

Eleven months later I had 1 million supporters. 

In the four months following, I acquired 1.5 million MORE supporters.

In one year, and four months, I have been blessed with over 2.5 million followers.

That was never my plan.

I was not expecting any of this and frankly, I was completely unprepared. However I was grateful, honored and joyous over the fact that I had finally—found my calling.

I loved making videos, and people loved watching them. So much so, that in order to keep up with “demand” of continuing to do so, I decided to quit my job at the carpentry company – one of the scariest most liberating decisions I’ve ever made.

The thing is, making videos, brightening peoples days, and spreading awareness became my mission – I loved doing it. However my husband was working overtime to pay the bills, and truthfully if it wasn’t for Patreon, I would have had to stop and go back to work.

With a large number of supporters, comes a large number of people reaching out to me. So for those of you saying I look tired, or I don’t care about you because you reached out bearing your soul and I ignored you, I’d like to give you an inside look into my world.

This is from tonight, from my email—one of 5 inboxes…. observe the frequency of the incoming emails…

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 I have thousands of unread messages in IG and FB as well…

 

 

I can tell you one way I’ve changed…I am filled with so much gratitude that people are reaching out to me, I am honored they open up the way they do, but I’m just one person. And it is constantly in the back of my mind that I am unable to respond to everyone bearing their soul in my inbox.

As an empath, it kills. Especially with subject lines like this:

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Have I changed? Yes, I feel like I am letting people down on a constant basis. It weighs on me daily, and makes me feel depressed and unworthy of this incredible platform I’ve been given. There are days where, in order to keep my sanity, I steer clear of social media all together.  I have to.

I have recently been called names and unfollowed because I did a few sponsored ads. I need to put this into perspective for all of you say I’ve changed and all of my content is sponsored now. I know I don’t have to, but I want to.

I’ve made hundreds of videos.

Six were sponsored.

Those sponsored videos, are what allows me to make the rest of the videos for your enjoyment. Because I don’t get paid to buy props, film, and spend hours editing. I do that at no cost, because I like to make people happy.

I work with two companies, and the beautiful thing is – in order to watch the rest of my videos, YOU DON’T HAVE TO BUY A SINGLE THING! Heck, you don’t even HAVE to watch the sponsored videos. You can scroll on by and watch the rest of the stuff I spend my life creating – at no charge. Why does it bother you so much?

HERE IS SOMETHING I WANT YOU TO KNOW. 

And truthfully, I’m probably going to get in trouble for this next thing, but again, it’s important to me.

I work with two companies, because I truly love them as people, and as a brand. The companies have bought books for my supporters, sent flowers and beautiful cards to my door, and have allowed me to be 100% myself, while contributing to my family.

I have turned down tens of thousands of dollars, BECAUSE I don’t want people to think I’m a sell-out. Here are just some of the offers I turned down this month...

 

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I know I don’t need to (and probably shouldn’t) show you this but THIS, this right here is why it bugs me when people send hate mail and leave nasty comments. I always say no, I am trying to get by, not get rich, which is why I have kept it at only two companies.

 

I have changed, in many ways. I have learned as I go, grown, and tried my best, to make the most of my second chance at life.

If you think I’m different or want to unfollow me – then by all means, hit the button. My true supporters understand me, and my heart, and they are the ones I am concerned with. 

Things are moving at a rapid pace, and I’m gratefully trying to keep up. I am a wife and mother first, and a content creator next. I will continue creating content until someone kicks me off the internet, or I am no longer able to provide for my family while doing what I love.

I am so grateful to everyone who has stuck by me, and who see my true intentions and goals. I look forward to what the future has in store, and am honored to have those of you who “get me”, alongside me for this journey ❤

I love you all so much, and appreciate the love and support more than you will ever know!!!!

PS…I’M GOING ON EFFING TOUR, DUDDDDDE!!!!!!!

 

Author: JugglingTheJenkins

Mother, wife, friend, recovering addict.....

153 thoughts on “TO THE PEOPLE WHO SAY I’VE CHANGED…

  1. Do you know what you owe people? Not a damn thing. You can’t fix anyone. They need to fix themselves. You certainly cannot make everyone happy. Lord knows, I tried doing that for too many years. You just keep being you and doing what you need to do to survive this crazy world. And, if that includes making a few of us smile, it’s appreciated.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. I think you’re awesome. I’ve thought about reaching out to you for advice on blogging/vlogging but I know you’re super busy and will probably never get around to reading my email. You’re bombarded with thousands of them, probably every day. It’s amazing that you’re able to make some money doing something you love, and those complaining about it are probably just jealous that it’s not them.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I dont care how many ads you have! I will always watch your videos! You make your money! You deserve it! You always make me laugh when I need it! Embrace your success! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    1. No one can please everyone. Tiffany, I have spent every day since my son was born, 25 years ago, feeing guilty about something. Was I loving enough? Did I raise my voice too much? Now that he is a grown man does he know how much I loved him and still do? And I still worry about him just as much today as I did when he was young and totally dependent on me. What I am trying to say is that those who understand you, really, really understand you. And they are the ones that matter because you matter to us. Those who don’t understand and are nasty can move on and if they don’t that’s their problem not yours. Just be happy, take care of your family and don’t worry about all the negative people on the Internet, because those people that are negative and unhappy and fighting their own demons. And I will come see you on your effing tour‼️👏👍

      Like

  4. Omg! F@*ck the haters. I was actualky so glad to see you doing sponsored ads! You gotta make a living and regardless of what you do someone will have a problem with it. Hope you know what an inspiration you are ! Especially to recovering addicts like myself where we live in a world where its just now being talked about. And u are one of the few who have made it okay for people like me to share my story without fear of judgement. You are amazing and you cant save the world! I wish you all the best and giiirrrll you turned down all those people and companies! A sellout you are not and even if u accepted them all…do you. The people commenting negativw things need to worry less avout what your doing and more about taking the said stick fron their said anus.
    Namaste

    Like

  5. I love your stuff! I run my own business and it is AWFUL and stressful and some days so turn to you just to laugh even if just for 3 minutes! Thank you! I also purchased grove products BECAUSE you sponsor it. I don’t even have time to clean my house lol, but if a $24.99 purchase keeps you reigning in the money it’s worth trying a product! My sister in law is in the same business as you and it is so hard to see the hateful crap people post online! Thank you for being true to yourself and bringing so many people joy! If you ever want some Scrabble Tiles for your home, contact me, there on me :).

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  6. I actually discovered your page through one of your sponsored videos and I am so happy that I did. Thank you for continuing to do what you love.

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  7. You are AMAZING! No need to explain yourself to anyone. Your doing what few have been able to do and you should be so proud yourself. Much love my friend!

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  8. Tiffany, there are times where my minutes watching you are the only laugh I will have for days is your video – and how is you having a sponsored video any different from someone selling Pampered chef or Mary Kay or anything else – they are trying to support themselves and their family just like you.
    Remember this Tiffany,
    YOU CAN’T FIX STUPID!
    Hater’s gonna hate and you have already risen above so very much in your life, this isn’t even worth worrying about. They obviously have issues far beyond your video – you are just their outlet.
    Just keep being you as that is who the reset of us tune in to watch, support and laugh with.
    Patti from SW Wisconsin

    Like

  9. Girl, do you. You inspired me try my hand at blogging. Even if it doesn’t catch fire, I’m learned how great it feels to put it out there. And if can earn a living at it- BONUS. Congrats on your success. Best wishes it continues and you have a ball on your tour!
    If you’re interested-https://punchingcancer.wordpress.com
    A little window into the mind of a mama battling childhood cancer.
    #gogold #morethanfour

    Like

  10. You are the one getting MILLIONS of viewers, not the people who are criticizing you. That means you are doing something right. I couldn’t imagine having all this put on you (all the emails and messages plus critics). Like you said, you are only one person. As long as you are doing the best you can, then that’s all that can be expected of you. Keep doing what you’re doing. You bring joy to MANY.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I honestly can not fathom why people give a shit if you open a box of awesome stuff in a video!

    People are always wanting something for nothing and thats just not viable, you DESERVE to take those offers to put food on your table.

    If you were a stand up comedian you’d charge entry and no one would bat an eyelid, if you created another make up brand you’d charge for it, you write a book you sell it so as a content creator and entertainer loved by millions take the Effin jobs and keep doing what you do best, making us laugh!

    Liked by 1 person

  12. I can’t imagine your life but I am so thankful that you are a success story! I read your blog and watch your videos because you are hilarious! I need someone who isn’t fake and that’s you!

    Like

  13. You should take EVERY deal YOU want to. Heck one add on every video is cool with me. We have so anti-commercial that we are killing creators financially. I hate when an add pops up in the middle of the video but I don’t mind at all and the creator talks about a product at the appropriate time. Don’t worry about the vocal minority. When you create a community this big it’s totally unavoidable. Please know that you are loved by so many and you deserve to get paid!!! ( like we all want to)

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Lastest best was Dino & Unicorn. That’s my house. Daughter & 3 grandbabies live with us 3, 7. 11 . Keep it real that’s why we watch. : ) Reality at it’s best. We aren’t alone with the craziness that go’s on in our homes. LOL seen it first hand at yours, haha ; ) and by the way we all have snapped and yelled at our kids we are only human. There little adults. lol Time out should be for us. I usually apologize for yelling, later when I calm down and explain when they are asked to do something to please do it next time not after the 10 times I ask. They get it, there not dumb, they know how to push our buttons to get what they want. Especially if we’re trying to do something. I have to comment on what you said about your kids & manners. We get the same compliments for our kids all the time. On how great it is that they have manners. What’s with that. Was told by daycare not many kids use manners anymore and it was nice to see it from a three year old.Hell I still picture my Dad behind me ready to smack me in the head if i didn’t please, thank you, sir, ma’am .So I guess we aren’t doing so bad are we.
    Love ya

    Like

  15. I don’t think people understand the sheer amount of time that goes into creating online content which we as bloggers/vloggers give away for FREE. And then they get annoyed and unfollow when we promote a product, one we truly believe in and that may even help them – which is usually why we’re sharing it. Unless we’re lucky enough to have a spouse that can comfortably support us financially, we’re going to have to “sell” something at some point. Otherwise this is just one hella expensive hobby.

    Anyway, I love your honest and hilarious videos! Keep it comin’ mama, you’re doing a good thing here ♡

    Like

  16. Frigging trolls. Just brush that shoulder off, provide for the family, and POST YOUR TOUR DATES!!! I adore you and your courage! Love you big lots!!

    Like

  17. It kills me that some people think they have a right to tell someone on the internet how to live their life or how to provofor their family! Do we all love free content, sure, but the people behind the camera gotta eat! Unless these trolls want to pay you a decent salary to entertain them they need to keep their opinions to themselves! You owe them nothing! Keep doing your thing and don’t worry about the naysayers! You are incredibly brave for layin your shit out for the world to learn from and quite frankly your hilarious!! I love how real you are and how much I can relate to you! 💕

    Like

  18. Some people are just ugly inside. They cannot see the beauty in others. I’m not talking about physical beauty (even though you’re a hot mama). I’m saying you’re also a beautiful soul. No one appreciates other’s hard work. You worked hard to be who you are today. You’re not perfect. NO ONE IS! How dare anyone judge, point a finger, or belittle/demean another human being let alone a MOTHER! I have never purchased any of the boxes you make videos of but I LOVE the videos make about them. They make me laugh because you’re being REAL about the products and about the company. Is it going to change my life to buy something from Grove Collaborative..NO but will my day be filled with laughter because you’re going around smelling their fall scents…ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY!!!!!! So MOM on girl! We love you just the way you are!!!!!

    Like

  19. I love you and support your choices Tiffany. The only thing I want from you is for you to continue to be happy with the choices that YOU are making. Sending you love and strength.

    Like

  20. I love you and support your choices Tiffany. The only thing I want from you is for you to continue to be happy with the choices that YOU are making. Sending you love and strength.

    Like

  21. This is regards to the “in the closet” I have listened to this a million times.. my son is an addict and you have given me so much hope.. he is 28 has been an addict since he was 17.. Only by the grace of God and so many people praying for him he is still alive.. he finally scared me enough to call the police on him he was on the run for a month harassed me the whole time. He finally turned himself in was incarcerated for 35 days, he came out weighing 25 pounds more than when he went in and was clean and sober. He relapsed 2 times.. but he is clean now.. he’s doing good at the moment.. you have gotten me through some of the toughest times in my life with the things you said in that closet about being an addict and what we were doing was enabling .. I always knew we were and yes it made it easier on us at times.. I told him that I was not going to love him to death.. and you also said the same thing.. thanks for being there and continue to post your wisdom.. there’s a lot of us out here! Bless you and thank you❤️

    The Beards

    Like

  22. You are doing so much good for so many people being real. Seriously I look forward to your videos and can relate in so many ways! Keep your head up!

    Like

  23. Tiffany, like you said, your family comes first. For that reason, you should accept some more of those sponsors because you have three little people you are sponsoring in this thing called life. They are worth it and so are YOU!! There is no shame in it and there damn sure shouldn’t be any guilt for providing for your family. So if something looks interesting to you, have them send you a sample, and if it floats your boat then you let them sponsor you and put money in your pocket and food on your table! No you don’t owe anyone an explanation, nor do you owe anyone an apology for doing what’s best for your family! Like you said, they don’t even have to watch the sponsored videos! You do you, remember your first priority, and everything will be fine. You are loved!

    Like

  24. Thank you for giving us giggles….and telling your story. You make people laugh, and you should get paid. Why not? You’ve devoted your life to helping people. Some people are just bored and mean.

    Like

  25. I hope that on days when the world seems too critical and you need a reminder that you’re AWESOME you get this far down in your comments and see this one. For those that leave you because you aren’t acting as their personal “free therapist” I hope the door hits them on the way out. You can only have so many friends and keep the same quality of friendship. Real people rarely go viral because they’re simply TOO real. But when it happens, it’s beautiful, and it reminds the rest of us that we are NOT alone. That has to be enough for everyone. We all must value that or risk losing it. I hope you don’t sell out for real at some point because you would leave the world a little darker, make the real people feel like we are alone. Doing what you’re doing, turning down offers, making sure each decision is what YOU want and pasting this struggle and pain is the way you’re proving to all of us you’re NOT selling out and you don’t plan to. Ask any mother of three kids what they would do to have more time doing what they love and more time to be with the people they love and see if they would do it differently (* they wouldn’t *). Your not making your own damn white vinegar cleaners with lemon rind because a Mom working full time with three kids doesn’t have time for that shit. But how AWESOME is it that you can get great kid friendly cleaning products sent to your door, and you only have to make a video about it. I’m not a sell out, but if Aldi came along and said make a video of your grocery order and the groceries are on us, just tell people why you love us, DAMN STRAIGHT I’d be all over that shit. Free groceries and I get to get paid for telling people what I already tell strangers (including the occasional ALDI employee 😯) how ALDI changed my life and my family’s eating. (*We can now get a LOT more produce than we could afford before*). Guess WHAT BITCHES, I JUST MADE A PLUG FOR Aldi, and I didn’t get paid for it. But I would… If I could and so would any intelligent NORMAL person. I don’t care if it’s cliche BECAUSE SO MANY PEOPLE SAY IT TO YOU… Keep doing YOU, YOU ARE REAL. You are BEAUTIFUL and you are doing the best you can and your rocking it, that’s inspirational, not a sell out. ❤️

    Like

  26. I started following you because of your hilarious sponsor videos! Then figured out I loved the rest of your content to. ♡ for every follower you lose you gain one more 🙂 do you and make videos that I can relate too! P.s. I got both those damn boxes with no regrets 😎😁

    Like

  27. I love coffee. I mean I looooove coffee…and more specifically, I love Tim Horton’s coffee. I would do anything to defend and/or support my favourite brand of liquid life-support. But if Starbucks offered to help me pay the bills I would slap a smile on my face and suck down a latté for them anywhere…anytime.
    That’s not being a sellout…that’s called being an adult and taking care of business.
    Tune out the noise…the world is not enough.

    Like

  28. hi, Tiffany, I think your the best! please keep doing what your doing, you inspire me, I am 47 and been battling ovarian cancer for 3 years now, will be on chemo the rest of my life, but seeing your videos and funny ones, where you are 2 different people, sorry, not caught up on the official lingo! it makes me laugh, cry cause I know I;m not alone in this world, I been with doug for 18 years, don’t talk ro my family, they thought I was lying and trying to get attention when I said I had cancer, so, who needs anyone negative in their life? not me! your family is great and very supportive! I hope you all have a great weekend, and I love! your exercising video and the one with the chair, who in the world could do that??!! lol!

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  29. Tiff it breaks my heart u even feel u had to do that. You can totally tell you’re a recovering addict because you know the real people have your back and will never stop supporting u so screw the people who don’t it won’t make or break you. They’re honestly lucky you dont have an assistant to write the emails for u because you’re not a fake person!! Much love to you.
    Love a never ending supporter! 😍

    Like

  30. Girl. Bless you. I’m glad you posted this and you need to really take it to heart because you weren’t sent here to please a damn soul. You were sent here to create content that helps people get through their days. And that is ALL. And we as your audience are grateful for that. Content creators have bills too. You do not owe anyone anything. You certainly don’t owe anyone your mental health or your guilt. I am so sorry that it’s keeping you up at night. I hope posting this has helped. Continue to make people smile. Continue to remind people they’re not alone in this very tough world. And I will continue to watch and I will continue to be grateful. Thank you.

    Liked by 1 person

  31. I love you Tiffany & know in my heart I will meet you one day. I’ve never doubted your intentions. Remember “You ain’t complaining, so no need ‘xsplaining” Ha Ha ! Come on tour to Gainesville FL ⭕️❌

    Like

  32. Please do not let negative ninnies stop you. You are a breath of fresh air to those of us hurting. You show us there is another side to the pain. Love you girl xo

    Like

  33. The first video I saw of yours was about 3 weeks of you sitting in your car asking people to just be kind to each other. I didn’t know who you were, but I knew instantly that I liked you. I followed the link to your FB page, and then your YT page, and have been watching your videos NON-STOP for the last 3 weeks! I think you are the most real person and I identify with you so much! I am not a recovering drug addict, but I am anxious, neurotic, depressed, and extremely addicted to food… anyways, I know it’s so hard to ignore the stupidity and hateful judgement of others, most who have never walked in your shoes, but please try to! You are an amazing person who inspires so many, and whatever you need to do to take care of your family is NO ONE’s business!! Please remember how important what you do every day is to so many people!! Those few who have to say hateful things hiding behind their keyboards shouldn’t be given a second thought. The THOUSANDS x’ 10000 that love you and care about you and your family stand behind you and support you no matter what!!

    Like

  34. Psht! Make that money honey ! Don’t turn everything down to please people that don’t know you. You have a once in a lifetime opportunity to do something really great for your family and yourself and that something is making hella money to secure their future and yours. The haters can go suck an egg

    Like

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