I’ve included a Christmas picture of me from 1990 for no reason at all.
Some of you watched my most recent “Live” video (…Er, sorry about that) and aside from witnessing me flop my “pool toy” around, you got to hear some news I shared in regards to possibly writing a book.
Since sharing this news, my car has been egged and protestors have been posted up in my yard with signs reading: “F*** your book!” for 2 days straight… (Kidding.)
However, I have received lots of messages from you guys with opinions, advice and words of encouragement. It has all been positive, no one has been mean or hateful (to my face) about this, so I’m incredibly grateful for all of the love you guys show me on the daily– You’re my peoples, man.
Anyway, I wanted to clear up any confusion, because I was so nervous about all the angry emoji’s I was receiving on my live that I don’t think I properly explained–so I’ll do that now.
- It was suggested that I take a break from sharing things pertaining to my specific life story, until I write the book and send it in it’s entirety to a certain agent. At which point he would like to propose it to his big boss people on the top floor. So what does this mean? Technically–nothing. Literally. I have no deal, no one has agreed to sign me, and I have not hired any agents or editors.
- I have prayed about this, asked a psychic, flipped a coin and opened 10 fortune cookies in hopes of discovering the “right” path to take. Here is my predicament: A) I stop sharing my weekly blogs with you guys – in essence leaving you hanging– in hopes I’m able to strike a book deal. Getting a book deal is highly unlikely, but possible. Anything is possible, right? It would mean not only generating income for my fan-damily, but it will also (hopefully) inspire those who are still struggling; showing them that a purposeful life after addiction is possible. This has been my ultimate goal — hence me being insanely transparent and divulging WAY to much about my personal life to you guys. I want you to know show you that you aren’t alone, because you’re not. Or, B)I continue to share my story here on my blog for you guys — my ride or die, A-1 since day one peeps–and passing up any chance of ever sharing my story in book form. Spending the rest of my days wondering what kind of opportunities I missed while knitting sweaters for my cats alone in my tiny home.
- So, it’s tricky. I don’t have the right answer, each choice leads to a completely different future and that’s a lot of pressure.
- I will tell you this, my friends, and we are gonna speak hypothetically here. I have begun the editing phase of my book. Initially, I was going to copy and paste all the blogs I have already posted, then add the rest–the meat of the story–onto the end. However, when I went back to do that, I realized that when I initially began blogging–I had no clue what the frig I was doing. Misspellings, incorrect grammar and punctuation galore, it was a nightmare. So I’m currently in the process of rewording everything.
- I am going to post a final chapter tomorrow and then… Take a break to sort things out. It’s not done forever, I’m just pausing the series for now. (So shitty, I know.)
- Here’s what I’m thinking though, Okay? Let’s say that me publishing a book is part of a “big plan” that the universe, God, Allah,(whatever you believe)-has in store. Then obviously, all of you (My homies) would have first dibs.
- Also, the agent came up with an idea that I personally thought was awesome. You may not, but we will give it a shot. If someone were to consider taking my book on, they would first look at my social media accounts (crap) to see what kind of following I have. Soooooo, he suggested that I propose a trade to you guys.
- I have never been one to self-promote, it makes me feel weird, and really uncomfortable. But if it will help me make a future for my family, I will paint my logo all over my van and stand in the middle of the street with a sign saying “like my damn page on Facebook!”. So here’s the deal. Now I don’t want ya’ll to go around force-adding people to my page, no one likes that. However, if you can give your friends the run down on what I’m all about over here, and they decide they want to get in on the action, I am prepared to make a deal.
- If you can convince 5 of your friends to fall madly in love with me — no, wait, if you can convince 5 of your friends that they should like my Facebook page and/ or follow my blog @ http://www.jugglingthejenkins.com–and they do it, you are allowed to ask me ONE question about my story –anything you have been dying to know, and I will answer it…in 10 words or less. If you can talk 10 friends in to liking my Facebook page – You get to ask me a question and recieve the unpublished Chapter #6 sent to your inbox. Boom. If you can convince more than 10 people–than I am moving you into my spare bedroom and we will live happily ever after. Just kidding. I don’t have anything cool to offer after 10. I think there’s a dusty old X-box laying around here somewhere and some leftover Easter candy. But that’s it.
- Lastly, and most importantly, a few of you mentioned in my inbox that you were concerned I would become a “sell-out” and I totally understand why. These days it’s hard to find people who are genuine, and have their followers, friends, fans, best interest at heart. It’s really important to me that you understand that this will never be the case. I started blogging for one reason and one reason only–because I was really bored one day. Just kidding. I wanted to use my struggles to inspire people like me. People who feel or have felt hopeless, desperate to find the light at the end of the tunnel. I wanted to show them they aren’t alone, and that we are all a little weird in our own way. That will never change.
I will never lose sight of why I started, no matter what happens. I will continue to make crazy videos, write articles about motherhood, addiction, marriage and adulting. And I will still be chatting with you guys everyday. The only difference will be that there isn’t a super-exciting-edge-of-your-seat series to look forward to each week, no big deal, right? Lol.
Please let me know how you guys feel about this, as well as any suggestions or concerns you have. Your excitement keeps me excited, so your opinions matter.
I love you guys and look forward to hearing from you!
P.S. Even though my sons preschool teach watched me pull out a sex toy last night on camera, things were totally cool when I dropped him off and picked him up today…So, in case you were wondering. We’re still cool. Poor Kaiden.